Dementia – A Growing Concern
I think that we all know of someone, a friend, loved one or relative, who is/has dementia. In a recent article in the HuffPost (week of May 20, 2023), it was reported that one of three people will develop dementia in their lifetime in the UK. Over half of citizens there know someone with the disease.
Recently I had lunch with a friend whom I’ve known since childhood. He is beginning to show signs of the disease, and it makes me sad. Maybe we are reluctant to visit with someone who is experiencing this and wonder what we would say to them. The article suggested several questions that we can use to open communications. While current events may elude them, past experiences may still be recalled and discussed or enjoyed again. Just adapt the list to the person or situation as appropriate.
- What have you learned over the course of your life that you can pass on to me – what do you think it would be good for me to know?
- Tell me about some of your earliest memories.
- Where were you born and raised, and what was it like there while you were growing up?
- What was your childhood like overall and what is your fondest memory from when you were young?
- What were your school days like and what did you most enjoy learning about at school?
- What hobbies and interests did you have, and what did you most enjoy doing in your free time when you were younger?
- What is the most surprising thing you think people don’t know about you?
- What was your favorite music or artist when you were growing up and why?
- What has been the most interesting job you’ve ever done?
- Who have you loved during your life, how did you first meet them, and how did your love story unfold?
- What is the most significant historical moment you lived through or witnessed and what did you think about it all?
- What was your favorite decade overall and why?
- Who were your role models and who influenced you in your life and why?
- Where was the most interesting place you ever travelled to and what did you make of the place?
- What was the most challenging obstacle you had to overcome in your life and what did you learn from that?
- What is your proudest accomplishment in life and why?
- Looking back, what advice would you give to your younger self?
- What’s the best book you ever read and why?
- What have been the biggest changes you’ve seen throughout your lifetime?
- What’s the funniest thing that ever happened in your life and what makes you laugh?
- What are your hopes for the future and how would you most like to be remembered?
There are so many aspects of the disease and how sufferers, families, and caregivers cope with it. A few movies have attempted to portray life with Alzheimer’s and dementia patients but are criticized as inaccurate. One movie I saw a few years ago was, Just Alice, about a college professor who experienced early onset Alzheimer’s. It was based on Lisa Genova’s 2007 bestselling book by the same name. If you search, you can find other movies too. This movie, I thought, gave an accurate portrayal of a family’s experience. Of course, people and situations can be vastly different. We shouldn’t duck away from this topic but seek to learn more. You never know.